Dewey & LeBoeuf Satire – Compared to Titanic

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THE SINKING OF DEWEY LEBOEUF

WHO KILLED BIG LAW
(Who Killed Davey Moore, Bob Dylan)
WilliamBanzai7

Who killed Big Law,
Why an’ what’s the reason for?

“Not I,” says the Managing Partner who pressed economic fate,
“Don’t point your finger at me.
I could’ve stopped it before it was too late
An’ maybe kept the Firm from this unhappy fate,
But my gold struck Partners would’ve booed, I’m sure,
At not gettin’ bigger and bigger and more.
It’s too bad professional collegiality had to go,
But there was a pressure on me to leverage, you know.
It wasn’t me that made it fall.
No, you can’t blame me at all.”

Who killed Big Law,
Why an’ what’s the reason for?

“Not us,” say the angry law graduate crowd,
Whose insatiable screams filled the hiring arena aloud.
“It’s too bad it died alright
But we’re hocked to the teeth and our budget is tight.
We didn’t mean for it to meet this fate,
We might be greedy but we’re not ingrates,
There ain’t nothing wrong in that.
It wasn’t us that made it fall.
No, you can’t blame us at all.”

Who killed Big law,
Why an’ what’s the reason for?

“Not me,” says the Wall Street banker big wig,
Puffing on a big bailout cigar.
“It’s hard to say, it’s hard to tell,
I always thought that they did just a little too well.
It’s too bad for them that their model’s dead,
But if it is sick, its because of their own swelled heads.
It wasn’t me that made them fall.
No, you can’t blame me at all.”

Who killed Big Law,
Why an’ what’s the reason for?

“Not me,” says the rainmaker star,
With his CV and business card still in his hand.
“It wasn’t me that knocked it down,
My hands never touched it none.
I didn’t commit no ugly sin,
Anyway, it’s always the money that decides who wins.
It wasn’t me that made it fall.
No, you can’t blame me at all.”

Who killed Big Law,
Why an’ what’s the reason for?

“Not me,” says the legal recruiter,
Pounding e-messages like a lateral roto-rooter,
Sayin’, “The head hunting business ain’t to blame,
There’s just so much greed in the legal comp game.”
Sayin’, “Poaching is here to stay,
It’s just the good old American way.
It wasn’t me that made it fall.
No, you can’t blame me at all.”

Who killed Big Law,
Why an’ what’s the reason for?

“Not me,” says the legal Grim Reaper whose Darwinian fists
Laid the legal biz low in a cloud of non-billable mist,
Who came here from the subprime meltdown’s back door
Where exuberant billing ain’t allowed no more.
“I hit them, yes, it’s true,
But that’s what I am here to do.
Don’t say ‘murder,’ don’t say ‘kill.’
It was destiny, it was God’s will.”

Who killed Big Law,
Why an’ what’s the reason for?

 

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THE SINKING OF DEWEY LEBOEUF

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